Changing our minds about ourselves

Every day is an opportunity to change our minds about how we see ourselves.   I have had some times recently this summer where I have felt "less than" because I gained some unsightly (unsightly to ME...my husband still thinks I am hot) fat and started feeling less than thrilled with my appearance.  Knowing intellectually that the way I look on the outside is no reflection of my internal self,  I made myself feel worse by giving myself a hard time about it.  Normal right?  NOT.  So I used a dry erase marker on my mirror a few days ago to write the words "Your thoughts create your reality".    In typical "Carmen" fashion I use every thought and experience in my life to find a way out of negative behavior and thinking.  This little message (so far)  has been a great tool for reminding me that I AM in charge of my life.  I can make it or break it "so to speak".
Every day is also a chance to change your mind about what your day will bring.   The most useful tool I have ever found is to be in the moment by stopping & centering yourself with three good breaths with my eyes closed and remembering a message that resonates with you (like my mirror mantra).  After you have done that only then should you make decisions, only then react to situations with your kids, only then speak with your spouse when they make you mad,  and only then tell yourself a story about how you look.  

 Too many times our minds are programmed to send us messages that we aren't even aware we are sending.  No amount of calorie restriction, no amount of meditation, no amount of praise from our spouses or partners will change how we feel about ourselves until we stop the damaging internal dialogue by stopping and being present for ourselves with a quiet awareness that allows us to praise ourselves.  Praise for what great parents we are, what wonderful husbands or wives we are (even when we are mad), what great friends we can be (even if we don't send a card for every birthday), what great kids we are (even if our parents have passed away we honor them by presenting ourselves to the world in a positive way), and what great humans we are by living honestly and ethically and lovingly on this earth.



This isn't a long post about health...it's just a reminder that no matter our gender or status in our community, no matter the size of our home or the kind of car we drive....we owe it to ourselves to be first and foremost loving and accepting of ourselves.  Our higher power would not be pleased if we acted any other way.  So as I wake tomorrow and get focus back in my eyes after putting my contacts in the message will be the same "Your thoughts create your reality".   I hope to go about my day with a sense of awareness that I have some control over my day.  I hope to breathe deeply and take time before I react or respond.  But if I don't?  I hope to not judge myself harshly either.

In peace,

Cfh